Needle and Groove

My needle dips and purrs. I spin and trace the familiar grooves of a Bing Crosby record, coaxing warmth into the air. I’m old. Dust clings to me like memory. But I don’t mind; it softens the notes, wraps them in a hush. I’ve been singing in this house longer than the boy has been alive.

In the kitchen, Grandma’s pen incants across a yellowed notecard as she writes a carrot cake recipe. I watch in my own way—not with eyes, but with how the room breathes when she moves.

She hums “Like Someone in Love” along with Bing and me. Not always in tune, but always in spirit.

“It’s just more enjoyable, doing things like you’re in love,” she says, her voice light as flour dust. The boy blinks at her, brow furrowed, not ready for what she means.

His fingers trail over the stack of vinyls leaning against my side—reverent and unsure, like he’s touching a holy thing. He pauses over Billie Holiday—the heavy one, soaked in sorrow. “Gloomy Sunday.” A sadness older than him settles into the corners of the room.

Outside the window, a ballet studio glows. The boy catches a flicker of the raven-haired girl twirling inside. Her shadow pirouettes in the soft afternoon light.

I keep playing, softer now. I let him color the spaces between the notes.

Grandma finishes her recipe with a sweep of her hand, then brings the boy into the ritual of baking. He measures and stirs, spills a little, laughs a lot. Cinnamon and nutmeg coat the room.

The purple hour is here. The cake batter rises. I stretch Bing’s easy croon and Billie’s beautiful despair, weaving together the boy’s wide-eyed longing, Grandma’s worn patience, and the girl’s solemn plié across the street.

Maybe that’s what it means to do things like you’re in love:
To spin your song even when no one quite understands.
To pour yourself into the air and hope someone hears.

The boy doesn’t have the words yet.
But he’s listening.
And I’ll keep singing until he does.

Mathieu Parsy is a Canadian writer who grew up on the French Riviera. He now lives in Toronto and works in the travel industry. His writing has appeared or is forthcoming in publications such as BULL, Bending Genres, Maudlin House, Does It Have Pockets, and elsewhere. Follow him on Instagram at @mathieu_parsy.

A Song for Mathieu